Everyone has a guardian angel except Chuck... he guards himself.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#258

It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.

#372

Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.

#26

As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."

#297

Chuck Norris can win at solitaire with only 18 cards.

#553

Chuck Norris does not code in cycles, he codes in strikes.

#104

A handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

#663

Chuck Norris can find the 404 page.

#305

Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.

#599

How many Chuck Norris' require to screw a light bulb? None, he will screw it all.

#121

Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

#685

Chuck Norris CAN count his chickens before they hatch.

#261

Chuck Norris shot the sheriff, but he round house kicked the deputy.