When Chuck Norris stares into the abyss, the abyss nervously looks away.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#492

Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself.

#269

Crime does not pay - unless you are an undertaker following Walker, Texas Ranger, on a routine patrol.

#367

In the Words of Julius Caesar, "Veni, Vidi, Vici, Chuck Norris". Translation: I came, I saw, and I was roundhouse-kicked inthe face by Chuck Norris.

#597

Chuck Norris sits at the stand-up.

#230

According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.

#194

Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.

#578

When Chuck Norris break the build, you can't fix it, because there is not a single line of code left.

#654

Chuck Norris can dry his hair under water.

#415

Chuck Norris has to register every part of his body as a separate lethal weapon. His spleen is considered a concealed weapon in over 50 states.

#559

With Chuck Norris P = NP. There's no nondeterminism with Chuck Norris decisions.

#434

For Spring Break '05, Chuck Norris drove to Madagascar, riding a chariot pulled by two electric eels.

#443

Only Chuck Norris can prevent forest fires.