Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night. 289 293 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 50% approval (582 votes)
Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.
Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.
Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.
Once Chuck Norris and Superman had a competition. The loser had to wear his underwear over his pants.
Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.