Chuck Norris shot the sheriff, but he round house kicked the deputy. 317 314 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 50% approval (631 votes)
While investigating a series of reported sonic booms in the area around Chuck Norris' home, authorities determined Chuck was just testing chili recipes.
Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always answers "Two seconds till". After you ask "Two seconds to what?", he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
Chuck Norris does not follow fashion trends, they follow him. But then he turns around and kicks their ass. Nobody follows Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has never been accused of murder because his roundhouse kicks are recognized as "acts of God".
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.