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Chuck Norris can swim on land.
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#399
In a tagteam match, Chuck Norris was teamed with Hulk Hogan against King Kong Bundy and Andre The Giant. He pinned all 3 at the same time.
#198
The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron's ass halfway through the first chapter.
#621
Chuck Norris tears can cure the cancer, but the sad thing is Chuck Norris never cries.
#114
Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe with eleven herbs and spices. Nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
#728
Chuck Norris has won the lifetime achievement award...twice.
#672
Chuck Norris can laugh with a straight face.
#207
Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks.
#53
Chuck Norris' database has only one table, 'Kick', which he DROPs frequently.
#41
Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
#636
Chuck Norris made the sun by rubbing his hands together.
#160
Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
#282
Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.
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