Chuck Norris can make onions cry.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#415

Chuck Norris has to register every part of his body as a separate lethal weapon. His spleen is considered a concealed weapon in over 50 states.

#640

Jaws stays on the beach when Chuck Norris swims.

#722

Chuck Norris once won the Kentucky Derby, on foot.

#221

As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.

#129

A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.

#731

Chuck Norris can cut through steak with a plastic spoon.

#203

The crossing lights in Chuck Norris' home town say "Die slowly" and "die quickly". They each have a picture of Chuck Norris punching or kicking a pedestrian.

#516

Chuck Norris doesn't need sudo, he just types "Chuck Norris" before his commands.

#382

Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car.

#707

Some people can piss their name in to snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name in to concrete.

#416

A movie scene depicting Chuck Norris losing a fight with Bruce Lee was the product of history's most expensive visual effect. When adjusted for inflation, the effect cost more than the Gross National Product of Paraguay.

#435

The Manhattan Project was not intended to create nuclear weapons, it was meant to recreate the destructive power in a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick. They didn't even come close.