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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris can watch the radio.
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#203
The crossing lights in Chuck Norris' home town say "Die slowly" and "die quickly". They each have a picture of Chuck Norris punching or kicking a pedestrian.
#341
70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.
#286
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys.
#105
Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disembowels them.
#481
Chuck Norris wipes his ass with chain mail and sandpaper.
#369
Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you're thinking to yourself, "But Chuck Norris isn't black", then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.
#548
Chuck Norris doesn't need an OS.
#478
Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
#348
Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.
#731
Chuck Norris can cut through steak with a plastic spoon.
#147
Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.
#323
Chuck Norris does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Chuck Norris kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.
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