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Chuck Norris' penis is a third degree blackbelt, and an honorable 32nd-degree mason.
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#350
Chuck Norris doesn't go on the internet, he has every internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.
#227
'Icy-Hot' is too weak for Chuck Norris. After a workout, Chuck Norris rubs his muscles down with liquid-hot MAGMA.
#232
In an act of great philanthropy, Chuck made a generous donation to the American Cancer Society. He donated 6,000 dead bodies for scientific research.
#81
There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Chuck Norris has breathed on.
#291
Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.
#292
Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.
#589
Chuck Norris knows the value of NULL, and he can sort by it too.
#392
Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
#693
It's never a party without Chuck Norris.
#377
There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris.
#293
Contrary to popular belief, the Titanic didn't hit an iceberg. The ship was off course and ran into Chuck Norris while he was doing the backstroke across the Atlantic.
#370
When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
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