Chuck Norris understands women.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#139

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

#201

If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.

#400

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.

#477

Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.

#244

Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with a mixture of iron shavings, industrial paint remover, and wood-grain alcohol.

#691

Chuck Norris is Simon Cowell's judge.

#462

When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.

#410

Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick faster than the speed of light. This means that if you turn on a light switch, you will be dead before the lightbulb turns on.

#380

What many people dont know is Chuck Norris is the founder of planned parenthood. Not even unborn children can escape his wrath.

#324

One time, Chuck Norris accidentally stubbed his toe. It destroyed the entire state of Ohio.

#693

It's never a party without Chuck Norris.

#484

Chuck Norris likes his ice like he likes his skulls: crushed.