Chuck Norris understands women.

295 240

More Chuck Norris facts

#116

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

#123

When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.

#281

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

#56

Chuck Norris' brain waves are suspected to be harmful to cell phones.

#516

Chuck Norris doesn't need sudo, he just types "Chuck Norris" before his commands.

#505

It works on my machine always holds true for Chuck Norris.

#669

Everyone has a guardian angel except Chuck... he guards himself.

#35

If you rearrange the letters in "Chuck Norris", they also spell "Crush Rock In". The words "with his fists" are understood.

#347

Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.

#448

They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.

#590

China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.

#407

Chuck Norris is his own line at the DMV.