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Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
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#488
Everything King Midas touches turnes to gold. Everything Chuck Norris touches turns up dead.
#438
TNT was originally developed by Chuck Norris to cure indigestion.
#130
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
#270
Chuck Norris invented the internet, just so he had a place to store his porn.
#203
The crossing lights in Chuck Norris' home town say "Die slowly" and "die quickly". They each have a picture of Chuck Norris punching or kicking a pedestrian.
#660
Chuck Norris can grill a popsicle.
#741
Chuck Norris can suck a garden hose through a golf ball.
#67
The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. You know what happened to them.
#478
Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
#331
Chuck Norris can skeletize a cow in two minutes.
#594
Chuck Norris can read from an input stream.
#28
When God said, "let there be light", Chuck Norris said, "say 'please'.
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