Chuck Norris once rode a nine foot grizzly bear through an automatic car wash, instead of taking a shower.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#604

Code runs faster when Chuck Norris watches it.

#412

Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.

#541

Chuck Norris' programs never exit, they terminate.

#682

Chuck Norris voids warranties.

#281

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

#624

Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.

#406

The 11th commandment is "Thou shalt not piss off Chuck Norris". This commandment is rarely enforced, as it is impossible to accomplish.

#642

Chuck Norris can hear the speed of light.

#658

Chuck Norris can eat one pringle.

#130

When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.

#152

Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

#377

There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris.