Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#162

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

#206

Superman once watched an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger. He then cried himself to sleep.

#33

Coroners refer to dead people as "ABC's". Already Been Chucked.

#651

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

#503

Project managers never ask Chuck Norris for estimations... ever.

#398

Chuck Norris starts everyday with a protein shake made from Carnation Instant Breakfast, one dozen eggs, pure Colombian cocaine, and rattlesnake venom. He injects it directly into his neck with a syringe.

#700

Guns are warned not to play with Chuck Norris.

#344

Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.

#252

Do you know why Baskin Robbins only has 31 flavors? Because Chuck Norris doesn't like Fudge Ripple.

#670

Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.

#91

Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle - you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.

#498

MySpace actually isn't your space, it's Chuck's (he just lets you use it).