If you try to kill -9 Chuck Norris' programs, it backfires. 282 363 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 44% approval (645 votes)
The US did not boycott the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow due to political reasons: Chuck Norris killed the entire US team with a single round-house kick during TaeKwonDo practice.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
Faster than a speeding bullet... More powerful than a locomotive... Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... These are some of Chuck Norris' warm-up exercises.
The pie scene in "American Pie" is based on a dare Chuck Norris took when he was younger. However, in Chuck Norris' case, the "pie" was the molten crater of an active volcano.
Chuck Norris' version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.