If you try to kill -9 Chuck Norris' programs, it backfires. 282 363 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 44% approval (645 votes)
You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.
They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.
Chuck Norris can be unlocked on the hardest level of Tekken. But only Chuck Norris is skilled enough to unlock himself. Then he roundhouse kicks the Playstation back to Japan.
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
It's widely believed that Jesus was Chuck Norris' stunt double for crucifixion due to the fact that it is impossible for nails to pierce Chuck Norris' skin.
While investigating a series of reported sonic booms in the area around Chuck Norris' home, authorities determined Chuck was just testing chili recipes.