Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#587

Chuck Norris can speak Braille.

#525

Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.

#228

Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.

#339

Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child. The bed wet itself out of fear.

#239

If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.

#74

MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips. Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.

#139

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

#432

Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.

#265

Chuck Norris does not play the lottery. It doesn't have nearly enough balls.

#309

When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.

#502

Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft.

#106

Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.