Jean-Claude Van Damme once kicked Chuck Norris' ass. He was then awakened from his dream by a roundhouse kick to the face.

264 269

More Chuck Norris facts

#309

When Chuck Norris does division, there are no remainders.

#81

There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Chuck Norris has breathed on.

#666

Chuck Norris' bones break sticks and stones.

#393

When in a bar, you can order a drink called a "Chuck Norris". It is also known as a "Bloody Mary", if your name happens to be Mary.

#53

Chuck Norris' database has only one table, 'Kick', which he DROPs frequently.

#423

Chuck Norris doesn't daydream. He's too busy giving other people nightmares.

#177

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

#592

Chuck Norris doesn't have pubic hairs because hair doesn't grow on balls of steel.

#106

Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.

#513

When Chuck Norris is web surfing websites get the message "Warning: Internet Explorer has deemed this user to be malicious or dangerous. Proceed?"

#400

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.

#238

If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.