Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#307

Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

#573

Chuck Norris uses canvas in IE.

#95

Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

#90

In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

#411

When Chuck Norris goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.

#195

Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.

#381

Chuck Norris was banned from competitive bullriding after a 1992 exhibition in San Antonio, when he rode the bull 1,346 miles from Texas to Milwaukee Wisconsin to pick up his dry cleaning.

#730

The reason Superman flies is because he knows Chuck Norris is on the ground.

#693

It's never a party without Chuck Norris.

#565

No one has ever spoken during review of Chuck Norris' code and lived to tell about it.

#93

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

#676

Chuck Norris has size ten feet but wears size three shoes.