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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris invented the bolt-action rifle, liquor, sexual intercourse, and football-- in that order.
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#418
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but there was a problem-- It wouldn't take shit from anybody.
#226
Some kids play Kick the can. Chuck Norris played Kick the keg.
#428
Diamonds are not, despite popular belief, carbon. They are, in fact, Chuck Norris fecal matter. This was proven a recently, when scientific analysis revealed what appeared to be Jean-Claude Van Damme bone fragments inside the Hope Diamond.
#144
When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies.
#390
Chuck Norris owns a chain of fast-food restaurants throughout the southwest. They serve nothing but barbecue-flavored ice cream and Hot Pockets.
#68
Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
#538
Chuck Norris hosting is 101% uptime guaranteed.
#532
There is no Esc key on Chuck Norris' keyboard, because no one escapes Chuck Norris.
#452
One time, at band camp, Chuck Norris ate a percussionist.
#408
Two wrongs don't make a right. Unless you're Chuck Norris. Then two wrongs make a roundhouse kick to the face.
#301
Kryptonite has been found to contain trace elements of Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks to the face. This is why it is so deadly to Superman.
#674
Chuck Norris did it his way and Sinatra sang about it.
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