Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle - you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#111

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

#192

Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.

#225

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

#727

Chuck Norris bit the apple logo.

#409

Who let the dogs out? Chuck Norris let the dogs out... and then roundhouse kicked them through an Oldsmobile.

#649

Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.

#543

Chuck Norris protocol design method has no status, requests or responses, only commands.

#689

Chuck Norris once bought Chicago pizza in Seattle.

#484

Chuck Norris likes his ice like he likes his skulls: crushed.

#66

If Chuck Norris were to travel to an alternate dimension in which there was another Chuck Norris and they both fought, they would both win.

#332

The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.

#318

He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.