Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#332

The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.

#444

When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.

#285

Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.

#693

It's never a party without Chuck Norris.

#237

Chuck Norris invented a language that incorporates karate and roundhouse kicks. So next time Chuck Norris is kicking your ass, don?t be offended or hurt, he may be just trying to tell you he likes your hat.

#520

Chuck Norris does not need to know about class factory pattern. He can instantiate interfaces.

#541

Chuck Norris' programs never exit, they terminate.

#236

In a recent survey it was discovered the 94% of American women lost their virginity to Chuck Norris. The other 6% were incredibly fat or ugly.

#238

If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.

#603

Chuck Norris could use anything in java.util.* to kill you, including the javadocs.

#259

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.

#274

Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation. Chuck Norris needs toothpicks.