The pen is mightier than the sword, but only if the pen is held by Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#156

Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Chuck Norris.

#84

Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.

#243

Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.

#704

Chuck Norris has a vacation home on the sun.

#622

Chuck Norris can remember the future.

#579

Chuck Norris types with one finger. He points it at the keyboard and the keyboard does the rest.

#496

Chuck Norris burst the dot com bubble.

#686

Chuck Norris can look at you in a tone of voice.

#244

Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with a mixture of iron shavings, industrial paint remover, and wood-grain alcohol.

#617

Chuck Norris can drown a fish.

#722

Chuck Norris once won the Kentucky Derby, on foot.

#143

While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.