The pen is mightier than the sword, but only if the pen is held by Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#174

When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them.

#523

Bill Gates thinks he's Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris actually laughed. Once.

#421

Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.

#616

Once Chuck Norris signed a cheque and the bank bounced.

#395

Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.

#99

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse kick you in the face.

#29

Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks: "Do you want fries with that?". Because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't want fries with anything. Ever.

#214

Chuck Norris did in fact, build Rome in a day.

#720

When Chuck Norris crosses the road, the cars have to look both ways.

#335

The square root of Chuck Norris is pain. Do not try to square Chuck Norris, the result is death.

#330

4 out of 5 doctors fail to recommend Chuck Norris as a solution to most problems. Also, 80% of doctors die unexplained, needlessly brutal deaths.

#13

If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.