Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.

331 350

More Chuck Norris facts

#291

Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.

#166

Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his mother's womb.

#24

The Bible was originally titled "Chuck Norris and Friends"

#744

Chuck Norris once ran around the Earth so fast he was able to roundhouse kick himself in the ass.

#387

Think of a hot woman. Chuck Norris did her.

#376

Most people fear the Reaper. Chuck Norris considers him "a promising Rookie".

#352

It is said that looking into Chuck Norris' eyes will reveal your future. Unfortunately, everybody's future is always the same: death by a roundhouse-kick to the face.

#229

When Chuck Norris was a baby, he didn't suck his mother's breast. His mother served him whiskey, straight out of the bottle.

#223

Chuck Norris won super bowls VII and VIII singlehandedly before unexpectedly retiring to pursue a career in ass-kicking.

#521

The class object inherits from Chuck Norris

#609

Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.

#699

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.