Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold. 331 350 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 49% approval (681 votes)
Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks: "Do you want fries with that?". Because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't want fries with anything. Ever.
Scientifically speaking, it is impossible to charge Chuck Norris with obstruction of justice. This is because even Chuck Norris cannot be in two places at the same time.
Chuck Norris doesn't need garbage collection because he doesn't call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick().
The movie "Delta Force" was extremely hard to make because Chuck had to downplay his abilities. The first few cuts were completely unbelievable.
Tom Clancy has to pay royalties to Chuck Norris because "The Sum of All Fears" is the name of Chuck Norris' autobiography.