Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.

331 349

More Chuck Norris facts

#628

Chuck Norris plays pool with comets and astroids. He shoots them into black holes.

#194

Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.

#528

Chuck Norris doesn't pair program.

#678

The Dead Sea was once alive before Chuck Norris bathed there.

#256

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

#704

Chuck Norris has a vacation home on the sun.

#211

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

#260

It is believed dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor. That's true if you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor.

#272

It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

#617

Chuck Norris can drown a fish.

#126

There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.

#201

If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.