Chuck Norris will make your hair grow faster than Rogaine. 266 264 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 50% approval (530 votes)
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
If you were somehow able to land a punch on Chuck Norris your entire arm would shatter upon impact. This is only in theory, since, come on, who in their right mind would try this?
Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick faster than the speed of light. This means that if you turn on a light switch, you will be dead before the lightbulb turns on.
Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.