When Chuck Norris says "More cowbell", he MEANS it. 329 241 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 58% approval (570 votes)
A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.
Scotty in Star Trek often says "Ye cannae change the laws of physics. This is untrue. Chuck Norris can change the laws of physics. With his fists.
Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick faster than the speed of light. This means that if you turn on a light switch, you will be dead before the lightbulb turns on.
When Arnold says "I'll be back" in Terminator movie it is implied that he's going to ask Chuck Norris for help.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
When in a bar, you can order a drink called a "Chuck Norris". It is also known as a "Bloody Mary", if your name happens to be Mary.
It's widely believed that Jesus was Chuck Norris' stunt double for crucifixion due to the fact that it is impossible for nails to pierce Chuck Norris' skin.