Chuck Norris does not need a watch, he decides what time it is.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#274

Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation. Chuck Norris needs toothpicks.

#285

Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are known today as Giraffes.

#745

Chuck Norris can swim on land.

#377

There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris.

#148

Chuck Norris doesnt shave, he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.

#311

Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.

#572

Chuck Norris is the ultimate mutex, all threads fear him.

#355

Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.

#85

According to the Encyclopedia Brittanica, the Native American "Trail of Tears" has been redefined as anywhere that Chuck Norris walks.

#111

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

#590

China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.

#222

Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.