When Chuck Norris crosses the road, cars look both ways.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#690

Chuck Norris caught a bullet by blinking.

#619

Once Chuck Norris and Superman had a competition. The loser had to wear his underwear over his pants.

#635

Chuck Norris once sold eBay to eBay on eBay.

#105

Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disembowels them.

#525

Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.

#312

Chuck Norris used to play baseball. When Babe Ruth was hailed as the better player, Chuck Norris killed him with a baseball bat to the throat. Lou Gehrig got off easy.

#180

It takes 14 puppeteers to make Chuck Norris smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.

#465

Chuck Norris doesn't believe in ravioli. He stuffs a live turtle with beef and smothers it in pig's blood.

#161

Archaeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined victim as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"

#407

Chuck Norris is his own line at the DMV.

#302

Saddam Hussein was not found hiding in a hole. Saddam was roundhouse-kicked in the head by Chuck Norris in Kansas, which sent him through the earth, stopping just short of the surface of Iraq.

#192

Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.