If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#483

Chuck Norris describes human beings as "a sociable holder for blood and guts".

#659

Chuck Norris' cat has 10 lives.

#389

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.

#410

Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick faster than the speed of light. This means that if you turn on a light switch, you will be dead before the lightbulb turns on.

#720

When Chuck Norris crosses the road, the cars have to look both ways.

#706

When Chuck Norris turned 18, his parents moved out.

#301

Kryptonite has been found to contain trace elements of Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks to the face. This is why it is so deadly to Superman.

#299

Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Chuck Norris. He only has two needs: killing people and finding people to kill.

#123

When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.

#675

Chuck Norris can bake in a Freezer.

#538

Chuck Norris hosting is 101% uptime guaranteed.

#528

Chuck Norris doesn't pair program.