If, by some incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win. Period. 267 315 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 46% approval (582 votes)
It is said that looking into Chuck Norris' eyes will reveal your future. Unfortunately, everybody's future is always the same: death by a roundhouse-kick to the face.
Chuck Norris has never been accused of murder because his roundhouse kicks are recognized as "acts of God".
As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.