Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#67

The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once. You know what happened to them.

#538

Chuck Norris hosting is 101% uptime guaranteed.

#500

Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.

#254

Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.

#711

What is the last thing that goes through the head of any Chuck Norris victim? His foot.

#581

If you try to kill -9 Chuck Norris' programs, it backfires.

#7

CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.

#672

Chuck Norris can laugh with a straight face.

#492

Chuck Norris writes code that optimizes itself.

#532

There is no Esc key on Chuck Norris' keyboard, because no one escapes Chuck Norris.

#91

Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle - you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.

#341

70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.