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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives.
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#127
When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.
#187
A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.
#401
Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.
#699
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
#575
Each hair in Chuck Norris' beard contributes to make the world's largest DDOS.
#484
Chuck Norris likes his ice like he likes his skulls: crushed.
#421
Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.
#381
Chuck Norris was banned from competitive bullriding after a 1992 exhibition in San Antonio, when he rode the bull 1,346 miles from Texas to Milwaukee Wisconsin to pick up his dry cleaning.
#344
Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
#341
70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.
#26
As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."
#645
Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.
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