Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends. 309 313 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 50% approval (622 votes)
Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you're thinking to yourself, "But Chuck Norris isn't black", then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.
In ancient China there is a legend that one day a child will be born from a dragon, grow to be a man, and vanquish evil from the land. That man is not Chuck Norris, because Chuck Norris killed that man.
Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he kills people.
When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
Chuck Norris kills anyone that asks: "Do you want fries with that?". Because by now everyone should know that Chuck doesn't want fries with anything. Ever.
How many Chuck Norris' does it take to change a light bulb? None, Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.