In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#292

Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.

#439

After returning from World War 2 unscrathed, Bob Dole was congratulated by Chuck Norris with a handshake. The rest is history.

#282

Chuck Norris uses a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

#745

Chuck Norris can swim on land.

#691

Chuck Norris is Simon Cowell's judge.

#81

There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Chuck Norris has breathed on.

#590

China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.

#422

After taking a steroids test doctors informed Chuck Norris that he had tested positive. He laughed upon receiving this information, and said "of course my urine tested positive, what do you think they make steroids from?"

#541

Chuck Norris' programs never exit, they terminate.

#500

Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.

#342

Jean-Claude Van Damme once kicked Chuck Norris' ass. He was then awakened from his dream by a roundhouse kick to the face.

#74

MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips. Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.