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Roundhouse your way through
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In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
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More Chuck Norris facts
#1
If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always answers "Two seconds till". After you ask "Two seconds to what?", he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
#440
Chuck Norris runs on batteries. Specifically, Die Hards.
#481
Chuck Norris wipes his ass with chain mail and sandpaper.
#279
Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
#564
No one has ever pair-programmed with Chuck Norris and lived to tell about it.
#550
Chuck Norris can compile syntax errors.
#355
Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.
#678
The Dead Sea was once alive before Chuck Norris bathed there.
#114
Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe with eleven herbs and spices. Nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
#238
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
#83
Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
#318
He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.
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