Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle. 374 275 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 58% approval (649 votes)
As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
For undercover police work, Chuck Norris pins his badge underneath his shirt, directly into his chest.