Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle. 373 273 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 58% approval (646 votes)
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
Chuck Norris did not "lose" his virginity, he stalked it and then destroyed it with extreme prejudice.
Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle - you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.