They say curiosity killed the cat. This is false. Chuck Norris killed the cat. Every single one of them.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#645

Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.

#223

Chuck Norris won super bowls VII and VIII singlehandedly before unexpectedly retiring to pursue a career in ass-kicking.

#372

Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.

#516

Chuck Norris doesn't need sudo, he just types "Chuck Norris" before his commands.

#130

When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.

#346

MacGyver immediately tried to make a bomb out of some Q-Tips and Gatorade, but Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the solar plexus. MacGyver promptly threw up his own heart.

#687

Chuck Norris can break water in half.

#714

When Chuck Norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up.

#94

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.

#559

With Chuck Norris P = NP. There's no nondeterminism with Chuck Norris decisions.

#211

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

#633

Chuck Norris doesn't win, he allows you to lose.