Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disembowels them.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#637

Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his faucet, he stares at it until it cries.

#733

Santa Claus tells Chuck Norris what he wants for Christmas.

#112

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

#746

Chuck Norris remembers the future.

#199

Hellen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.

#356

When you say "no one's perfect", Chuck Norris takes this as a personal insult.

#365

Chuck Norris was once in a knife fight, and the knife lost.

#537

If Chuck Norris writes code with bugs, the bugs fix themselves.

#118

Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.

#147

Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.

#645

Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.

#337

Chuck Norris has never been in a fight, ever. Do you call one roundhouse kick to the face a fight?