Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disembowels them.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#573

Chuck Norris uses canvas in IE.

#592

Chuck Norris doesn't have pubic hairs because hair doesn't grow on balls of steel.

#90

In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

#707

Some people can piss their name in to snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name in to concrete.

#586

Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird.

#35

If you rearrange the letters in "Chuck Norris", they also spell "Crush Rock In". The words "with his fists" are understood.

#430

The Drummer for Def Leppard's only got one arm. Chuck Norris needed a back scratcher.

#338

There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.

#744

Chuck Norris once ran around the Earth so fast he was able to roundhouse kick himself in the ass.

#221

As a teen, Chuck Norris had sex with every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history.

#398

Chuck Norris starts everyday with a protein shake made from Carnation Instant Breakfast, one dozen eggs, pure Colombian cocaine, and rattlesnake venom. He injects it directly into his neck with a syringe.

#516

Chuck Norris doesn't need sudo, he just types "Chuck Norris" before his commands.