Chuck Norris doesn't wash his clothes. He disembowels them.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#525

Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.

#509

Chuck Norris' beard can type 140 wpm.

#410

Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick faster than the speed of light. This means that if you turn on a light switch, you will be dead before the lightbulb turns on.

#348

Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.

#567

Chuck Norris doesn't use Oracle, he is the Oracle.

#679

Chuck Norris understands women.

#135

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

#204

Science Fact: Roundhouse kicks are comprised primarily of an element called Chucktanium.

#30

Chuck Norris' version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.

#743

The moon's shadow doesn't dare follow Chuck Norris.

#710

When Chuck Norris works out he doesn't get stronger, the machine does.

#631

Did you know that Chuck Norris was in every Star Wars movie? He was "The Force".