Chuck Norris made the sun by rubbing his hands together.

285 339

More Chuck Norris facts

#373

Every time someone uses the word "intense", Chuck Norris always replies "you know what else is intense?" followed by a roundhouse kick to the face.

#372

Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn.

#191

An anagram for Walker Texas Ranger is KARATE WRANGLER SEX. I don't know what that is, but it sounds AWESOME.

#121

Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

#619

Once Chuck Norris and Superman had a competition. The loser had to wear his underwear over his pants.

#104

A handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

#553

Chuck Norris does not code in cycles, he codes in strikes.

#394

Every time Chuck Norris smiles, someone dies. Unless he smiles while he's roundhouse kicking someone in the face. Then two people die.

#33

Coroners refer to dead people as "ABC's". Already Been Chucked.

#469

Mr. T pities the fool. Chuck Norris rips the fool's head off.

#181

Chuck Norris is responsible for China's over-population. He hosted a Karate tournament in Beijing and all women within 1,000 miles became pregnant instantly.

#429

Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.