Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... A suicide.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#352

It is said that looking into Chuck Norris' eyes will reveal your future. Unfortunately, everybody's future is always the same: death by a roundhouse-kick to the face.

#725

Chuck Norris can read and write emails from a typewriter.

#493

Chuck Norris can't test for equality because he has no equal.

#729

Chuck Norris runs laps around his opponent, in a drag race.

#377

There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris.

#171

Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.

#722

Chuck Norris once won the Kentucky Derby, on foot.

#341

70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.

#314

Guantuanamo Bay, Cuba, is the military code-word for "Chuck Norris' basement"

#434

For Spring Break '05, Chuck Norris drove to Madagascar, riding a chariot pulled by two electric eels.

#410

Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick faster than the speed of light. This means that if you turn on a light switch, you will be dead before the lightbulb turns on.

#244

Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with a mixture of iron shavings, industrial paint remover, and wood-grain alcohol.