Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky. 274 281 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 49% approval (555 votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't believe in ravioli. He stuffs a live turtle with beef and smothers it in pig's blood.
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life.
A high tide means Chuck Norris is flying over your coast. The tide is caused by God pissing his pants.
It's widely believed that Jesus was Chuck Norris' stunt double for crucifixion due to the fact that it is impossible for nails to pierce Chuck Norris' skin.