Chuck Norris built a better mousetrap, but the world was too frightened to beat a path to his door.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#713

Chuck Norris drove his mom home from the hospital after she gave birth to him.

#211

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

#15

Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life.

#110

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

#659

Chuck Norris' cat has 10 lives.

#651

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.

#91

Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle - you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.

#271

Chuck Norris does not own a house. He walks into random houses and people move.

#461

The air around Chuck Norris is always a balmy 78 degrees.

#593

Chuck Norris can write to an output stream.

#374

As an infant, Chuck Norris' parents gave him a toy hammer. He gave the world Stonehenge.

#606

Chuck Norris does not need a watch, he decides what time it is.