Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#634

Tornados occur when Chuck Norris sneezes.

#182

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

#568

Chuck Norris can dereference NULL.

#715

Freddy Krueger has nightmares about Chuck Norris.

#387

Think of a hot woman. Chuck Norris did her.

#544

Chuck Norris programs occupy 150% of CPU, even when they are not executing.

#653

Chuck Norris can win a staring contest while blinking.

#125

Some people like to eat frogs' legs. Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs. Hence, snakes.

#299

Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Chuck Norris. He only has two needs: killing people and finding people to kill.

#379

Chuck Norris once ate four 30lb bowling balls without chewing.

#183

Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.

#401

Chuck Norris is the only person who can simultaneously hold and fire FIVE Uzis: One in each hand, one in each foot -- and the 5th one he roundhouse-kicks into the air, so that it sprays bullets.