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Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
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#620
Chuck Norris can make fire using two ice cubes.
#266
How many Chuck Norris' does it take to change a light bulb? None, Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.
#243
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.
#421
Chuck Norris' sperm can be seen with the naked eye. Each one is the size of a quarter.
#623
Chuck Norris doesn't age, because time cannot keep up with him.
#744
Chuck Norris once ran around the Earth so fast he was able to roundhouse kick himself in the ass.
#215
Along with his black belt, Chuck Norris often chooses to wear brown shoes. No one has DARED call him on it. Ever.
#127
When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy's.
#523
Bill Gates thinks he's Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris actually laughed. Once.
#665
Chuck Norris doesn't drive, he tells the car where to go.
#176
James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
#630
There was never anything wrong with Achilles' heel until he got mad and decided to kick Chuck Norris.
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