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Chuck Norris is currently suing myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
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#656
Chuck Norris can go past the Character limit.
#482
When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.
#474
Chuck Norris' favorite cereal is Kellogg's Nails 'N' Gravel.
#332
The only sure things are Death and Taxes and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
#556
Chuck Norris solved the halting problem.
#185
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
#243
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.
#739
Chuck Norris can kill seven with one blow. By literally blowing on them.
#182
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
#545
Chuck Norris can spawn threads that complete before they are started.
#628
Chuck Norris plays pool with comets and astroids. He shoots them into black holes.
#486
Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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