Chuck Norris remembers the future.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#665

Chuck Norris doesn't drive, he tells the car where to go.

#398

Chuck Norris starts everyday with a protein shake made from Carnation Instant Breakfast, one dozen eggs, pure Colombian cocaine, and rattlesnake venom. He injects it directly into his neck with a syringe.

#244

Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with a mixture of iron shavings, industrial paint remover, and wood-grain alcohol.

#691

Chuck Norris is Simon Cowell's judge.

#8

Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.

#188

Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.

#620

Chuck Norris can make fire using two ice cubes.

#631

Did you know that Chuck Norris was in every Star Wars movie? He was "The Force".

#121

Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.

#713

Chuck Norris drove his mom home from the hospital after she gave birth to him.

#172

The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.

#510

Chuck Norris can unit test entire applications with a single assert.