Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#414

Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed. Some get away. They are called astronauts.

#139

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

#511

Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.

#644

Chuck Norris doesn't beat around the bush. He roundhouse kicks it to the face.

#93

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Chuck Norris.

#238

If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.

#392

Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.

#272

It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.

#210

Chuck Norris does not style his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

#568

Chuck Norris can dereference NULL.

#183

Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.

#439

After returning from World War 2 unscrathed, Bob Dole was congratulated by Chuck Norris with a handshake. The rest is history.