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Champions eat wheaties for breakfast. Chuck Norris eats champions for breakfast.
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#144
When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies.
#99
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Chuck Norris once and he will roundhouse kick you in the face.
#375
Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.
#659
Chuck Norris' cat has 10 lives.
#106
Chuck Norris doesn't churn butter. He roundhouse kicks the cows and the butter comes straight out.
#444
When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.
#7
CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
#188
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
#82
When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
#292
Everybody loves Raymond. Except Chuck Norris.
#206
Superman once watched an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger. He then cried himself to sleep.
#114
Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe with eleven herbs and spices. Nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
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