Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#299

Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Chuck Norris. He only has two needs: killing people and finding people to kill.

#47

Chuck Norris' keyboard has the Any key.

#657

Chuck Norris was the reason E.T. went home.

#295

The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.

#626

Chuck Norris doesn't need a keyboard he tells the computer to write something and it does.

#154

Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

#174

When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them.

#661

Chuck Norris irons his trousers with them still on.

#516

Chuck Norris doesn't need sudo, he just types "Chuck Norris" before his commands.

#552

Chuck Norris does not need to type-cast. The Chuck-Norris Compiler (CNC) sees through things. All way down. Always.

#269

Crime does not pay - unless you are an undertaker following Walker, Texas Ranger, on a routine patrol.

#400

Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.