Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#595

Chuck Norris never has to build his program to machine code. Machines have learnt to interpret Chuck Norris code.

#407

Chuck Norris is his own line at the DMV.

#581

If you try to kill -9 Chuck Norris' programs, it backfires.

#41

Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.

#205

Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. We weren't before his first space expedition.

#26

As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."

#629

Chuck Norris can stand on his head. His dick-head.

#204

Science Fact: Roundhouse kicks are comprised primarily of an element called Chucktanium.

#38

The pie scene in "American Pie" is based on a dare Chuck Norris took when he was younger. However, in Chuck Norris' case, the "pie" was the molten crater of an active volcano.

#637

Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his faucet, he stares at it until it cries.

#90

In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

#155

On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.