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Chuck Norris invented his own type of karate. It's called Chuck-Will-Kill.
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#498
MySpace actually isn't your space, it's Chuck's (he just lets you use it).
#92
Faster than a speeding bullet... More powerful than a locomotive... Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... These are some of Chuck Norris' warm-up exercises.
#436
Chuck Norris has banned rainbows from the state of North Dakota.
#327
They had to edit the first ending of 'Lone Wolf McQuade' after Chuck Norris kicked David Carradine's ass, then proceeded to barbecue and eat him.
#629
Chuck Norris can stand on his head. His dick-head.
#472
Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
#231
Chuck Norris once pulled out a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it.
#241
Chuck Norris' show is called Walker: Texas Ranger, because Chuck Norris doesn't run.
#319
The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Even the worst-laid plans of Chuck Norris come off without a hitch.
#487
Chuck Norris did not "lose" his virginity, he stalked it and then destroyed it with extreme prejudice.
#374
As an infant, Chuck Norris' parents gave him a toy hammer. He gave the world Stonehenge.
#312
Chuck Norris used to play baseball. When Babe Ruth was hailed as the better player, Chuck Norris killed him with a baseball bat to the throat. Lou Gehrig got off easy.
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