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Roundhouse your way through
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Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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#222
Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.
#65
Chuck Norris has a mug of nails instead of coffee in the morning.
#478
Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
#314
Guantuanamo Bay, Cuba, is the military code-word for "Chuck Norris' basement"
#723
Chuck Norris can buy the Sunday paper on Tuesday.
#633
Chuck Norris doesn't win, he allows you to lose.
#554
Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris.
#482
When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.
#94
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
#26
As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."
#408
Two wrongs don't make a right. Unless you're Chuck Norris. Then two wrongs make a roundhouse kick to the face.
#531
Chuck Norris doesn't use reflection, reflection asks politely for his help.
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