Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#707

Some people can piss their name in to snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name in to concrete.

#7

CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.

#342

Jean-Claude Van Damme once kicked Chuck Norris' ass. He was then awakened from his dream by a roundhouse kick to the face.

#591

Chuck Norris can install a 64 bit OS on 32 bit machines.

#395

Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.

#628

Chuck Norris plays pool with comets and astroids. He shoots them into black holes.

#518

Chuck Norris can access private methods.

#331

Chuck Norris can skeletize a cow in two minutes.

#274

Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation. Chuck Norris needs toothpicks.

#153

When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.

#264

Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.

#485

Chuck Norris can kick through all 6 degrees of separation, hitting anyone, anywhere, in the face, at any time.