Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#202

Chuck Norris is currently suing myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

#20

Wo hu cang long. The translation from Mandarin Chinese reads: "Crouching Chuck, Hidden Norris"

#316

Chuck Norris' roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.

#341

70% of a human's weight is water. 70% of Chuck Norris' weight is his dick.

#163

Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

#543

Chuck Norris protocol design method has no status, requests or responses, only commands.

#498

MySpace actually isn't your space, it's Chuck's (he just lets you use it).

#519

Chuck Norris can instantiate an abstract class.

#587

Chuck Norris can speak Braille.

#230

According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.

#554

Chuck Norris doesn't use a computer because a computer does everything slower than Chuck Norris.

#525

Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.