If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results. It just doesn't happen.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#178

Thousands of years ago Chuck Norris came across a bear. It was so terrified that it fled north into the arctic. It was also so terrified that all of its decendents now have white hair.

#230

According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.

#566

Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers COMMAND line.

#630

There was never anything wrong with Achilles' heel until he got mad and decided to kick Chuck Norris.

#680

Chuck fires a 6-round revolver 7 times.

#107

Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... A suicide.

#19

Chuck Norris once sued Burger King after they refused to put razor wire in his Whopper Jr, insisting that that actually is "his" way.

#661

Chuck Norris irons his trousers with them still on.

#95

Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

#266

How many Chuck Norris' does it take to change a light bulb? None, Chuck Norris prefers to kill in the dark.

#396

There's an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris.... Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.

#676

Chuck Norris has size ten feet but wears size three shoes.