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When Chuck Norris was born, he immediately had sex with the first nurse he saw. He was her first. She was his third. That afternoon.
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#225
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
#93
Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse. Horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
#350
Chuck Norris doesn't go on the internet, he has every internet site stored in his memory. He refreshes webpages by blinking.
#713
Chuck Norris drove his mom home from the hospital after she gave birth to him.
#378
President Roosevelt once rode his horse 100 miles. Chuck Norris carried his the same distance in half the time.
#585
Product Owners never argue with Chuck Norris after he demonstrates the DropKick feature.
#160
Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
#20
Wo hu cang long. The translation from Mandarin Chinese reads: "Crouching Chuck, Hidden Norris"
#168
The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
#487
Chuck Norris did not "lose" his virginity, he stalked it and then destroyed it with extreme prejudice.
#738
COVID-19 is desperate to develop a vaccine against Chuck Norris.
#359
Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time.
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