When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn't get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out. 326 281 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 54% approval (607 votes)
Chuck Norris doesn't need garbage collection because he doesn't call .Dispose(), he calls .DropKick().
Brokeback Mountain is not just a movie. It's also what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.
Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this a slow Tuesday.
That's not Chuck Norris doing push-ups -- that's Chuck Norris moving the Earth away from the path of a deadly asteroid.
In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.
A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded.