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Roundhouse your way through
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Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way.
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#45
Chuck Norris' keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
#142
When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
#308
The phrase 'break a leg' was originally coined by Chuck Norris' co-stars in Walker, Texas Ranger as a good luck charm, indicating that a broken leg might be the worst extent of their injuries. This never proved to be the case.
#251
Chuck Norris began selling the Total Gym as an ill-fated attempt to make his day-to-day opponents less laughably pathetic.
#471
Chuck Norris has volunteered to remain on earth after the Rapture; he will spend his time fighting the Anti-Christ.
#529
Chuck Norris can write multi-threaded applications with a single thread.
#470
Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people.
#472
Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
#649
Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
#347
Jack Bauer tried to use his detailed knowledge of torture techniques, but to no avail: Chuck Norris thrives on pain. Chuck Norris then ripped off Jack Bauer's arm and beat him to death with it. Game, set, match.
#406
The 11th commandment is "Thou shalt not piss off Chuck Norris". This commandment is rarely enforced, as it is impossible to accomplish.
#395
Some people ask for a Kleenex when they sneeze, Chuck Norris asks for a body bag.
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