Love does not hurt. Chuck Norris does.

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More Chuck Norris facts

#229

When Chuck Norris was a baby, he didn't suck his mother's breast. His mother served him whiskey, straight out of the bottle.

#471

Chuck Norris has volunteered to remain on earth after the Rapture; he will spend his time fighting the Anti-Christ.

#463

Chuck Norris plays racquetball with a waffle iron and a bowling ball.

#621

Chuck Norris tears can cure the cancer, but the sad thing is Chuck Norris never cries.

#319

The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Even the worst-laid plans of Chuck Norris come off without a hitch.

#35

If you rearrange the letters in "Chuck Norris", they also spell "Crush Rock In". The words "with his fists" are understood.

#336

Chuck Norris' testicles do not produce sperm. They produce tiny white ninjas that recognize only one mission: seek and destroy.

#195

Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.

#531

Chuck Norris doesn't use reflection, reflection asks politely for his help.

#583

Chuck Norris does infinite loops in 4 seconds.

#587

Chuck Norris can speak Braille.

#500

Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.