Some kids play Kick the can. Chuck Norris played Kick the keg. 338 259 Copy WhatsApp Tweet Share Reddit Pin 57% approval (597 votes)
According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive.
Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
MacGyver immediately tried to make a bomb out of some Q-Tips and Gatorade, but Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the solar plexus. MacGyver promptly threw up his own heart.
Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick faster than the speed of light. This means that if you turn on a light switch, you will be dead before the lightbulb turns on.
The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.
They had to edit the first ending of 'Lone Wolf McQuade' after Chuck Norris kicked David Carradine's ass, then proceeded to barbecue and eat him.